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Home » People & Communities » Humor & Pastime
 

I Have a Little Chat with Adam and Eve

 
Author: John T Jones, Ph.D.

I sent a postcard to Peter to see if I could have another chat with God. He said that I would have to wait my turn which would occur in 2788. He added that I would be dead by then but I might be able to catch Him on the bicycle path once I got there. He said that would be between 4:17 and 4:19 a.m. except on Sundays when he has about a trillion zillion prayers to answer. However, Adam was available.

I found myself standing in front of Peter at the Gate and he pointed and said, Adam wants to meet you in the park. He likes the outdoors.

Of course, I was flashed there and found Father Adam sniffing a huge red rose blossom. The fragrance was strong and made my head spin. Wow!

Adam didnt look up at me but said, Im sorry you are not getting The Grand Old Eternal today. Ill have to do. He is just too busy to handle everything. He depends on the rest of us to help him. Like on earth, he doesnt impose on us. We have to want to help out. Not everybody does.

I said, Do you mean that those who live in Heaven defy God?

Adam looked up at me with his translucent blue eyes and said, No. Never! They just dont always do what he wants when he wants it. What is it that you want? I hope it is not great wealth, good health, or peace in the world. Those things are so ephemeral. Dont you have something important for me today?

I said, If those that live here are not doing Gods will, is there a chance for another war in heaven? I dont want to come to Heaven if you are going to have another war. Ive had too much of that on earth.

Adam said, There are no belligerents here. There will be no war. There are those here who have decided that their heavenly reward should be doing what they want to do when they want to do it. They are off half the time taking space cruises. On the earth, they spent their time on sea cruises. They are not bad, just very useless.

I said, Ive always wanted to go on a sea cruise. I havent because they are expensive, you eat too much, the ship is crowded with other eaters, and you might catch the bubonic plague.

Adam laughed. Then I heard a woman laugh. Adam said, Is that you, Eve?

Eve came out from behind the rose bush. Adam said, You werent Eve Dropping were you? Then he laughed.

I though it was a pretty funny too but I decided to keep a straight face less Mother Eve was offended.

Adam said, This is Taylor Jones, the hack writer.

Mesmerized by Eve's beauty I just nodded. Eve said, Ive been reading your stuff on the Internet. I like your UFO articles. There is one correction, however, Xrytspet from Fanton in G10009845788899990766 does not fly an FnL7 Time Craft anymore. She has the newer FnL7-A Time Craft.

I said, That little snit. She told me that she didnt know where God lives. Shes been here hasnt she?

Eve smiled, her brown eyes shining. That could be right, Taylor Jones, the hack writer!

Adam said, Thats what you wanted to talk to God about, isnt it? You think you are going crazy. Well, worse things could happen to you. No use taking being crazy too serious. It might even lead you to greatness. Einstein had the delusion that if you put a large object into space, that space would be distorted around it.

I got Father Adam out of earshot from Eve. I said, Was Xrytspet from Fanton in G10009845788899990766 really here?

He laughed again. No, Taylor Jones, the hack writer. Eve likes to snoop around. She saw the briefing sheets on my desk saying that you had been writing a zillion articles for http://www.ezinearticles.com. Thats where she learned about Xrytspet from Fanton in G10009845788899990766.

I said, Ive got to get back home. My wife wants to go shopping tonight. Oh, and Einstein was right wasnt he?

Author Bio:

John T Jones, Ph.D.

Jones was a vice president of a Fortune 500 company subsidiary having the major responsibility for research and development and certain engineering functions. After he retired, he became editor of an international trade magazine. Jones is Executive Representative of IWS, sellers of Tyler Hicks wealth-success books and kits. He is a direct mail and mail order marketer and operates a dozen websites.

He has written three technical books, four novels (Bull, Revenge on the Mogollon Rim, Bone China, and In No Way Guilty), and many published papers on business, marketing, engineering and other topics. Details on many of these topics can be found at his personal web site.

Jones is a hack poet and amateur landscape painter. He lives in Idaho with his wife of 52 years. He has five children, three in medicine, a lawyer, and a portrait artist. The Jones? have thirty-two talented grandchildren (many with special musical talent and skills), and one great grand child.

Jones is a prolific writer which started when he was an engineering professor at Iowa State University (Go Cyclones!). He doesn?t know how to stop.

You can search for this article using: funny news, funny news stories, funny news articles, funny news headlines, current funny news
 
 
 

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